Accusations Are Flying.

Good grief!

Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Ben Affleck, Roy Moore, Conyers, Matt Lauer and the list, now up to 34, keeps growing etc. etc.

Let’s see now…  Did it start with, or was it further back than Bill Cosby being hung out to dry?

Don’t get me wrong, I am not validating or minimizing misconduct if it is indeed true and many may be. Neither am I giving credence to hype.

As more and more people “come out” with accusations and pseudo righteous indignation the more incredulous it becomes.  Some may be true, some not.

Consider Clinton.

Really, didn’t the public turning a blind eye to our “bad boy” president, not endorse this behavior? Because… at the time, not many people cared one whit when Bill Clinton did “his thing” in the White House, even though it is now currently being revisited. Perhaps it is about time.

It was those who stood behind him and rallied for him that bear the blame.  It was the proverbial you that gave men in general, permission to say and license to do what they do or have done.  If the president can do it, why can’t I? Come on now people, take responsibility for your part in this!!!

So to blatantly and unequivocally accept it all, how can you? Unless you were there and I’m sure you weren’t then how can you put so much credibility behind these accusations?  What happened to innocent until proven guilty?


What the public fails to consider, is that social norms since forty years ago has changed dramatically.  Certain conduct or dialogue then is repulsive today, yet it was not uncommon and women had little recourse for it and men were expected (more by other men) to behave badly.  I’ve seen women do it too,  cajoling them and leaving some men with the idea of open invites, but I’ve also seen men take sincere friendliness the wrong way.  (like where in the hell did they get the wrong idea?)  I’ve seen women plot to snare men. ( Monica Lewinski holding on to her tainted skirt? Get real. Don’t you find that suspect?)

Many of the men that have crossed my path over the years have said and done things I thought totally inappropriate at times. I was an attractive model and flight attendant and I heard just about everything. I met famous and not so famous people and I can’t even begin to recall how often I was hit on, leveraging sex and/or seen men behaving badly, which was too often, but can I attach a name to all of them? No! True, I hated it, but I moved on, it’s what we did in those days. It was not a reflection of me or the sum of them and I went on with my life. It was how things were.

Quite frankly, I personally cannot remember with any detail who or what someone may have said that was out of bounds. I take that back. I encountered several that did  but only two that stand out.  One, was a coworker, a pilot (I don’t even remember his name however) who rudely grabbed me.  The other case was of a woman on one of my flights who deliberately groped me in an inappropriate manner, does that count? I refrained from creating a scene because I was totally embarrassed. I stayed clear of her for the remainder of the flight as she smirked at me lewdly and I was relieved when she was gone. It was quite disconcerting on many levels. Was she a lesbian or did she think I was?  What did I do that made her think it was okay?  Haven’t we all asked that?

How many women have grabbed a guy between his legs, rubbed up against him, flaunted her cleavage suggestively or kissed an earlobe teasing a man, not to mention giving him the “come hither” look (that’s what it was called in the olden days) and how many men found this uncomfortable or a violation of their space?  Will these men please come forward?

Does it excuse bad behavior? Certainly not!   In my day, it was always up to me to set the boundaries and my choice to nip it in the bud. As a girl, I was not given guidelines as to what was appropriate or inappropriate behavior and some times I let things fly, not knowing what I should have done or stupefied that I hadn’t reacted indignantly, but that was more out of embarrassment.  Many young men were less so taught and I think that in part is why some are stating their apologies rather than denying their guilt. Now don’t be fooled, the more that do it, the more suspect they become. Some of those can be genuine but it could also be a sham… like “Ooops!, I got caught with my hand in the cookie jar!”  “I was a bad boy, I admit it, now get over it”

I recall too, that men targeted certain women.  If she looked like a “good girl”, they left her alone.  I remember specifically the “Coffee, Tea or Me” cracks, thanks to the Helen Gurly Brown book that came out during that period. It brought a great deal of uncalled for comments for flight attendants.  Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for this exposure if not simply to raise public awareness that any untoward conduct is unacceptable.


It was only an insightful parent that could/would teach these guys otherwise, which was rare then, and then to have it undone by their peers who influence them otherwise.  It is only recently that a progressive mother, who did not appreciate being treated like trash (and some men who had the foresight to see it as demeaning), began teaching their sons and daughters a little more about respect for self and others. It’s up to us.

In fact, for men of past generations, it was encouraged for them to be cads. It was a sign of their virility, their manliness. Even more so if you were in a position of power. It came with the job and everyone knew it, so why act so surprised?  I’m not saying we shouldn’t be indignant, but everyone knows this has been going on since time immemorial.


Also, consider this. I’m not the same person I was forty or fifty years ago. I don’t know about you, but I did some pretty stupid things in the 60’s. To hold me accountable for these is ludicrous because although I may have known I did stupid things, I certainly couldn’t tell you what they all were, nor do I want to,  much less be reminded of them.  (That’s why I’d never consider running for politics. I’m sure there’s been a toe or two I may have stepped on in my past and… that was not forgotten by someone and bound to bite me in my present.) Frowny face here.

If they really did it and they are recent infractions then yes, by golly, hang them from the rafters. They should be held accountable.

But… Consider this:

If we are so quick to be judge and jury to everyone that is accused then what about our own sins?  Are we the same person today we were ten, twenty, thirty or even forty years ago?  How many of us do NOT have regrets?  How many of us took those and resolved to do better, right?

To say they are not better today than yesterday is to say there is no hope for the countless of people in prison waiting for a parole or who will some day be released. What about the prisoner who reforms whether by accepting Christ or by whatever means and becomes a new person?

Yet, even they have advocates who campaign for them to be given a chance. Doesn’t everyone deserve that?


There’s also the issue of what we are feeding our brains.  Look at the shows on TV, books, movies and media we follow,  that are being produced because it’s what people absolutely love.  They are sexual, conniving and violent and suddenly the same people that love these are incensed?  I see a double standard that was and is still, only different. (It’s no wonder I like Hallmark, but even they hug now and then.)

If nothing else this is bringing the issue to the fore.  Granted, it is terrifying to some men altogether.  A gentle pat on the shoulders or back will no longer be tolerated or looked at the same way or so I’ve heard said. My husband was sad because he was hesitant and afraid to hug our great grand daughter because of all that’s been going on.  Will an accidental brush be considered deliberate?  Who hasn’t grabbed someone accidentally thinking they had their spouse or partner?  To what degree are people going to take this?

I greet people with a hug and sometimes a peck on the cheek. I like hugs. Are my associates going to be afraid to hug me now?  Is everything going to be suspect?

I just bet the people in Europe, who tend to be touchy-feely, are having a field day with this. Those Americans, what will they think up next?

Awareness and change is the key NOT overreaction. Think and be considerate of others.

It boils down to the old adage “Do unto others as you would have done to you”.



The Whole Picture

I know a great deal is happening in the world today.  Attitudes are changing, some good, some not so good.

In this mash of over stimulation and feeding of opinion, from every form of media and friends, how do we get the whole picture?  The TRUE picture?

Truth is relative, that’s a given truth be told. So much of what we believe is influenced by those around us, our friends, neighbors, educators, religion (if we attend), media and if we read, books. Sadly most of it comes from a combination of media and peer pressure.

Peer pressure is something we just can’t seem to avoid. We’re like cattle or perhaps sheep off to slaughter. Friends are an integral part of living and heaven forbid we disappoint friends. So that leaves MEDIA. MEDIA is the most damaging. TV especially because more people watch TV than listen to radio, in periodicals or the daily paper. Why people believe what they hear on TV as gospel is beyond me. Most of it is “he said, she said” anyway.

I recall an interview a few years back of an actor who had for several seasons or perhaps years, had played a villain on a long running soap opera.  He said in the interview, how surprised he was at the number of people believed it was for real. He was frequently being chastised on the street for being so bad. One day, he says, a woman literally came up to him from out of the blue and hit him with her purse.  The audience of course laughed, but what a sad commentary of how “our” belief system is influenced.  That’s why commercials work and why certain ones are aired at certain times and channels for a specific target audience. That’s also how our children’s minds get formed without us even being aware.  That’s how it is though.

How many people rely on media for their information?

TV news anchors and various talk shows constantly skew their information and cut and paste to present information to fit their own agenda. Now social media is in the mix and how even more impactive that has become.  Because now it’s the man on the street, showing us “live” as to what is going on.

Tell me, has anyone stopped to think how it is that someone just “happened” to see and shoot something as it unfolds from beginning to end and in it’s entirety without prejudice?  Who on earth is ready to roll all the time?  It’s hardly likely unless the event was contrived in the first place. Think about that. And the public believes it? Incredible. Generally if you see something happen, it takes more than a few seconds to get your camera rolling and by then you probably missed a good chunk of important information. It’s hard enough to get a good reel when you plan to shoot it. Trust me.

Low tolerance, high tolerance. It all goes awry when it comes to personal beliefs.  For example, someone may say they are tolerant of this or that and appear for all practical purposes to be so until someone who has an opposing ideology attempts to present theirs. Suddenly their “tolerance” is out the window.  What it really boils down to is so and so has no right to their voice if it conflicts with mine. In other words mine is right, theirs is wrong.  Period.

It’s human nature to hear what you want to hear and if you dislike someone you may be even more inclined to isolate the incriminating or what you want or need to indict them. Sometimes people don’t bother listening or hearing the whole message.  Oh, but wait!  Perhaps the whole message wasn’t shared, just a little this and that. Perhaps some media power that be edited it to discredit  one or uplift another.  How would you know?

There’s no doubt that if we want the truth, we have to go hunting for it and like hunting, it takes work and patience to find truth behind the stories that are being told.

I understand we are all under time restrictions, but do your best.

If you don’t take care, what you see is not necessarily what you’re gonna get. You could be in for a surprise.

We as the human race can be so foolish but for this country’s sake,  lets not be. Our future depends on it.

Do your homework folks.




Aaron Schock for President

I think the GOP would be remiss not to have Mr. Schock run for president.   I also think he’d be the best candidate to run against Hillary.  Why? Besides being a headliner at the moment, he’s good looking, smart, he has a fresh perspective and just might be what this country needs to bring the parties together. And, he’s good looking.

Hello?   Has anyone not noticed the Obama comments regarding Iraq and the “unintentional” results of the Iraqi war?  Hey, how obvious can you be?  Everyone knows that’s being thrown out there to “blame Bush” and Republicans. Democrats are pros at positioning themselves.

Aside from that, I think it’s interesting that Schock chose to step down.  I’m really curious as to all the why’s that brought him to this decision. (see link below of all the accusations which pale by comparison to those made of the Clinton’s in times past).

Seriously why should he step down? Hillary hasn’t and she won’t either no matter how much scandal dogs her.  The fact is, scandal is her middle name and has been since…forever.

S c a n d a l   i s   h e r   f r i e n d.

What does scandal get her?  Lots and lots of free publicity, not to mention SYMPATHY.  Oh yeah, everyone knows the best way to get people on your side is to be a victim.  “Poor thing, everyone is picking on her.” Of course we all know that Hillary is anything but a victim.

Hillary is a very clever woman and … Aaron pay attention here, what does she do?

SHE RIDES IT OUT.  She smiles, makes a few “logical” excuses (after she has thought it out carefully (of course) and puts her ducks in a row) then acts like everything’s perfectly fine.  She’s a pro.

Politico states “…as his prominence grew, Schock adopted an expensive lifestyle — staying in luxury hotels, dining at pricey restaurants, flying on private jets.”

Hmmmm, where have I heard that before?  If you recall when Mr. Obama took office, Mrs. Obama came under fire for taking frivolous and expensive personal trips (running into the millions) with extended members of her family, the government footing the bill … perfect! Yes, I know they all do it ie Laura Bush went to Africa seven times?

My point is he’s already there. Spending, living, acting and thinking like the president!!

I believe he has an amazing opportunity here.  Even the Democrats see him as being the best thing the GOP has going for them and let me see as CNN stated today. He is (was) the most “promising” young leader Republicans have. They like him!

Then I got to thinking, is he getting ready to jump ship – switch sides? There’s that too.

Everything I’ve read indicates that he’s not afraid to back Democrats if he thinks it’s the right thing to do, so back to my earlier statement and some Republicans (and/or Dems) may not like this, how better to bring our country together? What a concept. Could he be the one to get the parties to actually work together “for the people”? Would he? What a novel idea.

I am so sick of  party wars.  No one conceding because they don’t want the other party to look good or score points because they’ve actually made a decision “for the people”.  I thought politicians were to support and represent the common man?  What happened to that?

I’m sick of politicians lining their pockets, looking out for their own interests, and living by a different standard than what they dictate to the masses or making laws and decisions they will never have to live by?

I’m sick of our government giving more rights to outsiders than those who are legitimate residents. Case in point, an illegal in California can get a drivers license by showing just a proof of address whereas a legal resident (me) cannot get one without a birth certificate, passport, marriage and divorce documentation from all previous marriages and practically giving up my firstborn.

Okay, I will admit I’m probably getting into deep water here, but I am a very common sense-ical person. I see things simply and I make an effort to not pay attention to all the crap I see or hear in the media and what I do hear, I try not to let it color what makes sense. Does that make sense? <grin>


It makes sense to me that welfare should be temporary.  That people should be given incentives to work, not crippled by a lifetime of handouts.  All that perpetuates is a generation of entitlement and people with low self esteem and morals, not to mention the morale of the one working their tail off so that others can get a “free” ride. Why work when you can make more money on the dole?

It makes sense to me that people who have worked their whole lives putting into Social Security so they could have a cushion in their old age, shouldn’t have to see it thrown or ripped away from them and given to those who have not.

What didn’t make sense to me was the Iraqi war, but it didn’t make sense to me either that Bush got blamed for the twin towers and Katrina. (Yes, I’ve heard the conspiracy theories about that) I was watching the film Independence Day recently and I see Bush reacting as Bill Pullman did, “Why wasn’t I told about this?”

It makes sense that less is more.  I like the scripture in the Bible where Jesus states that the ten commandments can be summarized by only two commands.  ONE. That you love God with your whole heart, soul and mind. TWO. That you love your neighbor as yourself. How easy is that?

It makes sense to me that political correctness violates so many laws in of itself.  Stop and think about it.  If you prevent one person of expression because you think it might “offend” another, then you’ve violated that first persons rights.  Not to mention that it opens up another can of worms, giving prejudice power and causing greater division.

Gun laws so suck.  Face it. Bad guys will still get guns, they don’t give a flip about laws, that’s why they’re bad. It also leaves the general populace vulnerable.

So if Aaron Schuck can pony up and fight rather than back out and down then give him a chance.  He couldn’t do any worse than anyone else the last few years. I think it’s time for someone young and with fresh new eyes take office.

Having said all that, ah heck boot them all out!!

Addendum:  I think it’s interesting that Hillary’s controversial emails has to do with the Chinese contributing large amounts of money toward her campaign.  Is it coincidence that Josh Whedon’s “Firefly” series predicted the Chinese dominating the world or has the handwriting been on the wall for some time and the rest of us (me) just didn’t see it?

Just sayin’

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